Beware The “Group Ask”
The Pitfalls of Group Emails
Cops have a lot to teach us when it comes to asking for help. The next time you’re at a traffic intersection directed by a police officer, you’ll see what I mean. If they want you to do something, they point at you while making eye contact; oftentimes resulting in feelings of mild discomfort from being singled out. There’s no doubt about what you’re supposed to do and who the communication is directed at. Meanwhile in the civilian world, we send each other group emails asking for volunteers, requesting editorial input, approvals and other vague communications supposedly aimed at getting multiple people rowing in the same direction. These group ask emails are usually harbingers of screwups, disappointment and passive aggressive blame assignments around why something didn’t happen the way it was supposed to.
Transforming Customer Service: From Group Ask to CRM Integration
Consider the following group ask example in your business: Where does your sales@mybusiness.com address go? Whether it’s going to a single person or multiple folks on the same team, if you don’t have a clear system about who has the ball, you run the risk of dropping balls left & right. Our service@getlivewire.com address dumps into our customer relationship management (CRM) system where there’s a process detailing who’s responsible for claiming the inbound requests 24/7. Before we had this system, customer service was a nightmare. Unhappy customers & employees meant we needed a drastic change from our previous group ask workflow.
Fast forward to today and I still see people I work with group asking. I know they mean well, but as the old proverb says; “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.” If we’re not willing to point at someone the way the crossing guard does or don’t have a system for groups of people to effectively farm group ask repositories, we’re setting ourselves up for disaster.
Confrontation Avoidance and Its Consequences
Why do we group ask to begin with? Some of us understand the perils innately and we’re not happy until someone acknowledges the ball we handed off. Some of us need more prescription around these behaviors. To some extent, asking a person directly for something is a form of confrontation or conflict (remember how it felt when Officer Krupke pointed at you during carpool?) Many of us are conflict or confrontation averse. We’re all different and that’s OK. What isn’t different, however, is our clients’ expectations that we respond to inbound issues quickly & efficiently. They don’t care about excuses and will happily move on to your competitor across town.
Actionable Steps to Eliminate Group Asking in Your Organization
Consider the following easy next steps to stamp out group asking in your organization:
- Insist that group emails with requests are directed at a specific person and the requester not move on until acknowledgement has been received that the other person has the ball.
- Connect all your publicly available inbound email addresses to your company (such as sales@mybusiness.com or service@mybusiness.com) to a CRM solution such as Salesforce or Zoho so you can track all pending requests.
- Call out and coach any group asking behaviors you see in the organization privately (vs. throwing shade via reply all) so the group asker can learn and change their ways.
Do you have any group asking going on in your world? What will you do to stop it?
Henry Clifford is the founder and CEO of Livewire and has been an enthusiastic member of VACEOs since 2008. He also serves on the VACEOs Board of Directors as Vice Chair.
How to Handle Tough Workplace Conversations
Communication is a necessity. Addressing performance issues within your team, negotiating with clients, and resolving conflicts – all of these aspects of your business require specific and sometimes delicate conversations. Sensitive conversations can become emotional, which is why business leaders must master the art of navigating them to foster a workplace culture of collaboration and respect. If we avoid having these types of conversations, we risk costly misunderstandings, strained relationships, and missed opportunities.
Knowing how to manage these personal exchanges is the key to ensuring everyone walks away feeling heard. Kerry Patterson, co-author of Crucial Conversations, says, “They are make-or-break moments that can either propel us toward the kind of life we want to live or send us down a path we don’t want to go.” Here are essential steps to take when preparing for a hard conversation.
Preparing for a Hard Conversation
Step 1: Set the Stage Mentally
Before initiating the conversation, find an appropriate time to have the conversation and know your objectives. What would be a win? Reflect on your assumptions, emotional triggers, and the other person’s perspective. Understanding both sides of the situation is crucial for a constructive dialogue.
Step 2: Manage your Emotional State
Maintain composure throughout the conversation. Positive energy and body language can significantly influence the path of the dialogue—emote positivity with a warm smile, open body language, and eye contact. Remember to breathe and stay focused on your purpose, which will help you listen more effectively.
Step 3: Approach with Curiosity
Adopt an attitude of curiosity. Before you make your point, actively listen to the other person without interruption. Strive to understand their needs, desires, and concerns thoroughly — ask clarifying questions.
Step 4: Acknowledge and Validate
Be an active listener by nodding occasionally and demonstrate empathy by acknowledging the other person’s position. Validate their feelings and concerns to communicate respect. Taking ownership of your role in the situation helps build trust and move the conversation forward.
Step 5: Clarify Your Perspective
Once the other person has expressed their viewpoint, articulate your own without diminishing theirs. Offer clarifications and insights while respecting their opinions. Emphasize the desire to find common ground.
Step 6: Collaborative Problem-Solving
Transition into problem-solving mode by brainstorming solutions together. Encourage dialogue, ask probing questions, and build on each other’s ideas. Focus on finding sustainable resolutions that benefit all parties involved. If necessary, agree to take a break and resume the conversation once both parties have had time to collect their thoughts.
Additional Tips:
- Stay Focused on Purpose: Revisit your objectives if the conversation seems to veer off track.
- Don’t Take It Personally: Remain objective and avoid internalizing verbal attacks or disagreements.
- Respect Different Perspectives: Understand that individuals may not share your viewpoint, so approach discussions with an open mind.
- Use Conversation Openers: Thoughtfully prepare your opening comments to initiate discussions respectfully and purposefully.
- Remove Distractions: Avoid having screens on during the conversation; put your phones away.
By following these steps and tips, you can navigate crucial conversations at work with confidence and achieve positive outcomes that benefit everyone involved. Mastering these skills can create stronger relationships by fostering trust and understanding. Additionally, it demonstrates respect and empathy, which are essential for building a solid foundation in any professional relationship. Moreover, by actively listening, you show that you value the other person’s perspective, which can lead to more meaningful and productive interactions. Thoughtfully approaching and preparing for pivotal workplace conversations is key to fostering a productive and harmonious work environment.
Stephanie Ford is a Director of Warren Whitney and works directly with clients to deliver solutions in the areas of Strategic Planning, Board Governance, Succession Planning, and Facilitation. Stephanie has more than 25 years of diverse client experience and spearheads discussions with company owners and executive management to understand the unique challenges of their business. She explores possibilities for your future and determines the right resource.
What are Virginia CEOs Reading This Summer?
Leaders are readers, and VACEOs members are always talking about the learning they find in books and podcasts. We asked several CEOs, “What are you reading this summer?”
Corey Divine has been loving Find Your Yellow Tux, by Savannah Bananas owner Jesse Cole. Corey was struck that Jesse begins the book with his eulogy and says “If you were to die today, would you be happy with the life you lived and the legacy you left?”
Paul Meadows recommended (alongside the entire EOS library) Process!: How Discipline and Consistency Will Set You and Your Business Free, by Mike Paton and Lisa Gonzalez.
Peter Norman, CEO of Code3AV, is reading two. First, The Oz Principle: Getting Results Through Individual and Organizational Accountability by Hickman, Smith, and Conners. He commented, “Accountability has been one of the most important and most difficult things I’ve tried to master as a leader, but the Oz principle gave me a framework for it that really works – it taught me how to build a culture that focuses on staying above the line.”
And second, Multipliers: How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smarter, by Liz Wiseman. Peter said, “This book has shown me how my job as a leader is to build up my co-workers, invest in them, and get out of their way – speak less, listen more and ask more questions.”
Robin Green shared several classics that he’s been reading, including The Idiot, by Fyodor Dostoevsky and Tai Pan, by James Clavelle. He also recommended a non-fiction book called The Comfort Crisis by Michael Easter. Robins shares, “In short, our society has turned us into creatures of comfort, and it’s killing us. As a result of this book, I bought a ruck sack and have started carrying around 30 pounds on my back for my evening walks!”
Scot McRoberts read The Art of Gathering by Priya Parker. “As someone who plans a lot of meetings, I know a good meeting, but have never thought about exactly what makes one. This book is a touchstone for that. I especially love her starting point, which is that every gathering must have a clearly defined purpose.”
What are you reading this summer?
The Impact of Not Making Tough Decisions
As a seasoned advisor to CEOs, I have seen firsthand the detriment that avoiding tough people decisions can have on an organization. Failure to act can chip away at your culture and harm your company in ways you might not immediately see.
The Case of John and Mark
Case in point: Meet John, a visionary CEO of a mid-sized technology firm. John had successfully navigated his company through numerous challenges, earning a reputation for excellence. His team of dedicated employees not only delivered outstanding financial results but also created an unparalleled customer experience, driving customer loyalty and ensuring long-term relationships that added immense value.
However, John faced a critical challenge: Mark, a technically skilled employee who consistently clashed with colleagues and undermined the company culture. John knew Mark’s behavior was detrimental, but he hesitated to take action. He feared the short-term disruption and potential backlash that might come from letting Mark go.
The Consequences of Indecision
Instead of making the tough decision to fire Mark, John opted to move him to a different group within the company, hoping a change in environment would mitigate the issues. However, Mark created the same problems in the new group. His negative attitude and disruptive behavior continued to chip away at the company culture, causing discord among team members.
In John’s case, the cost of turnover created by retaining Mark was substantial. Five top performers left the company because of the toxic environment, costing the company in excess of $100,000 in lost productivity and recruitment expenses. The impact was not just financial; the loss of these high-performing employees also meant a loss of institutional knowledge and a blow to team morale.
Moreover, John’s hesitation to make the right decision resulted in a loss of respect within the organization. Employees saw his reluctance to address the issue as a sign of weak leadership. This further eroded trust and confidence in his ability to lead the company effectively.
Common Pitfalls for CEOs
This indecision is not uncommon. Many CEOs realize they have the wrong person in their organization but hesitate to remove them. This can lead to a toxic work environment, decreased employee morale, and a negative impact on the bottom line. Long-term, they do more harm than good, creating discord among team members and ultimately damaging the company’s reputation and financial performance.
Turning the Situation Around
Determined to turn things around, John eventually took action. He reassigned roles to better fit each employee’s strengths and made the difficult decision to part ways with those who were not the right fit, including Mark. Although challenging, the positive impact on the company was immediate. The team’s morale improved, the work environment became more collaborative and productive, and overall performance soared. Employee engagement increased, financial performance improved, and customer loyalty reached new heights.
Creating a Positive, Productive Work Environment
This experience is a testament to the importance of making tough decisions to remove the wrong people from an organization. Failing to address these issues can have a far-reaching negative impact on your company’s culture and performance. The right people, who align with your core values, are essential to driving your business forward and achieving sustainable success.
If you find yourself in a similar situation, don’t hesitate to take action. Evaluate your team against your company’s core values and make the tough decisions necessary to maintain alignment and foster a positive, productive work environment. The benefits of doing so will far outweigh the temporary challenges.
For more insights on how to implement these strategies and drive your business forward, consider seeking advice from experienced professionals who can provide new perspectives and actionable strategies. Your company’s next level of success might just be a conversation away.
David Ingram has been a member of VACEOs since 2006 and a Forum Facilitator since 2020. Dave helps entrepreneurs and business leaders by implementing EOS, facilitating peer groups, and serving on corporate boards.
Member Profile: Bryant Harrison of Seventh Wall
Q: Where did you grow up and tell us a little about yourself.
I was born in Atlanta GA, but moved to the sleepy Northern Neck of Virginia when I was 7 years old. This move gained me and my older brother, two new stepbrothers and a stepfather! My stepfather was a jolly sort of drill sergeant. He WAS actually a drill sergeant. But this was helpful with 4 boys.
I did well in high school and went to UVA as a Rodman Engineering Scholar. Given this new freedom, I made the very best of it by not going to class and failing almost every class my first semester. I decided to re-evaluate my decision-making paradigm…
Soon afterwards, I finally found a job I excelled at. I was a camp counselor at a YMCA summer camp. I quickly rose to the level of teen leader… then camp director… then to the Branch director of a newly minted branch of the YMCA in Northumberland County. I even reported to a board of directors! FANCY! This job taught me so many things that I’m not sure how else I’d have learned them. Tools of communication that I still use today with the Seventh Wall team.
I decided to go back to UVA to finish my degree. I got 3 years in and got busy fixing people’s computers for extra cash. I hired a guy… then another guy… then found myself with a tech company. That wasn’t intentional. I was supposed to be a cognitive scientist specializing in AI. WTF??!!
That all brings us to today! I have 5 grown kids and 1 still in school and I currently have good relationships with all 6 of them, so that is a blessing indeed! Also, I enjoy my work and love spending time with my supportive family, kind friends, and exciting fiancée!!
Q: Who inspired you to become an entrepreneur?
A: What a great question. My Dad. Not my drill-sergeant stepdad, but my birth-dad. He was a serial entrepreneur and amazingly supportive of any of my efforts. Also, he didn’t have a risk averse bone in his body. He’d try anything regardless of the consequences. This trait has pros and cons, as you might imagine. 🙃
Q: Please tell us about your journey to become a CEO.
A: Well, I was broke and trying to pay off UVA when my dad said, “Well why don’t you fix people’s computers, you’re always fixing mine.” I gave it a try and was amazingly successful. I was kind and patient with people and, as it turns out, being able to fix a computer problem is only half the equation. Communication, caring, diligence, and responsiveness are the other half. Also, to be fair, in 2004 you could change someone’s wallpaper and they thought you were a computer god! 🤣
I got busy and hired a guy to help… then another. Eventually A client came to me and said, “My home computers work better than my business computers, can you help me with my business too?” I agreed and ended up hiring business engineers to help scale the business. Now we are a full-service Managed IT and Cybersecurity company that is ALL ABOUT that human element. When you call us, the phone will ring maybe 2 times before you get to talk to a real person.
Q: How are you promoting leadership development at Seventh Wall?
A: It starts from the time they apply. At the first interview, we tell them that almost no one that started in a position at Seventh Wall has stayed there. Our director of finance used to be our dispatcher! Our goal is to find the things people naturally LOVE to do and help them move in that direction. Empowering people to articulate what they want, and then outlining a path for them to get what they want, usually helps bring out the leader in them.
Q: Are you working on any new business ideas?
A: Yes! You know when your IT security team says, “We’ve done all these great things, and you should be totally safe!” Now we no longer use “should”. We can say, for sure, what would happen if ransomware got into your business because of our new Simulated Attack Service. It’s amazing. This simulated attack uses malware programs that have had their teeth removed. So, instead of ‘biting’ they generate a report showing what they could get access to. It’s mind-blowing and can sometimes pay for itself with cyber insurance savings so yeah… I’m excited by this.
Q: Are there any national/business authors that you follow? What is it about them or their message that resonates with you?
A:
Simon Sinek
- Business leaders today need to create a culture for their teams. It’s not just about pay anymore.
Alan Watts
- Gosh, what do I say? Alan Watts got me through my divorce. I feel like he is the closest to the ‘truth’ that exists out there in the world.
Q: When you are not leading Seventh Wall, what do you like to do?
A: I like tons of stuff! I love good food and dining experiences. I love to spend time with people who are life-learners. I just have such good conversations with these types of people. I love board sports like snowboarding, kiteboarding, and skateboarding. I like building things too. My work is so very virtual, fixing plumbing or electrical, building a shed or chicken coop is just soothing for me.
Q: You’ve been championing connecting events in Charlottesville for our members and other CEOs. Why do you think it’s so important to connect socially?
A: For tens of thousands of years, we lived in small communities that supported each other. Only very recently has this changed in society. But people haven’t changed. They need community. At Seventh Wall, every person on the team could work from home every day and we could get rid of our office space. Yet, people come to work every day. After work, they hang out at the office and watch a few YouTube videos while having an after-work drink or maybe tell some jokes or play darts. Learning to enjoy life and work isn’t just something that’d be “nice to have”. It’s CRITICAL for humanity.
The types of CEOs that come to the Charlottesville events are the lifelong learners that I described above. They are thoughtful, fun-loving people who are trying their best and seem to genuinely want good things for their families and their teams and value connections with others. It’s good for these types of people to spend time together. I also plan the Cville meetups because I want to hang out with fun people and do fun things 😁.
Q: Tell us how you are involved in the community.
A: When my kids were little, I did the “dad with young kids” thing and was a Cub scout leader and planned kid parties and attended sporting events and generally took them all over the place. Now that my kids are mainly grown (only 1 of the 6 is still in high school), I have so much more free time. I think I’m rediscovering my place in the community and that much of my efforts to plan these CEO hang-out times is part of that journey. I’m certainly having a blast!
Q: You’ve been a member for 3 years. How have you grown as a CEO?
A: It’s been a superb journey. To sum it up. I’m now looking at appointing a company president to run the whole thing on my behalf. This would get me completely out-of-the-weeds and let me focus on the thing I do best: Being an evangelist for the Seventh Wall mission and vision of helping business owners build a culture of calm for themselves and their teams.
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